We’re at Orlando airport right now waiting for our plane. It’s very, very, very delayed and – instead of spending the afternoon in the heat of Florida – we’re sat in the International Departures lounge looking at a screen telling us just how late we’ll be.
There’s several problems here. Firstly, I won’t make it back to work tomorrow morning like I’d planned. Instead we’ll be turning up mid-afternoon and I’ll be a bit mashed up for my birthday on Saturday. Secondly we’re trapped in a room full of people moaning about the fact that we all won’t get back until tomorrow afternoon, so I can’t escape it no matter what I do.
I’ve just told Emily about my devious plan to make these long hours of boredom go faster. It’s all very simple. We should have taken off this afternoon, however it’s now looking more like an 11PM take-off because some “unscheduled maintenance” had to be perfomed on the Airbus coming out to meet us. This bit worries me slightly, because I’m all too familiar with “management speak”. In my book “unscheduled maintenance” simply means “a bit broke off and someone had to fix it”.
Ah, but what about my plan? Well, I’ve decided to get blind drunk. My theory is that, when boarding if I’m refused entry I’ll simply say, “Yeah, but I wasn’ pissed this afternoon when YOU should’ve boarded, so in theory it’s YOUR fault I’m pissed!”
It’s a masterplan like no other.
Oh, and the WiFi available in the airport isn’t free but strangely they do allow you to use Google for nothing, so I can simply browse the mobile-formatted versions of pages that Google throws onto my SPV M3100. Easy. ;)