Clean your rim

Let me start by quoting a recent Harpic Bleach advert…

“Keep your toilet fresh and stop nasty surprises nipping up to the rim….” (Shot of posh woman lifting seat) “…like the mother-in-law..”

So remember that people – Harpic Bleach keeps your mother-in-law away from your rim…


This weekend I went back to the hair-dressers / barbers – you know the one, I’ve mentioned them before. It’s basically a blokes barbers but with just women working there. The 18-year-old pole dancer cut my hair and, as it was quite a warm day, she had quite a low-slung top on.. Dear me.. Well… I’ll just chuck a few words in this next sentence and you can work out the rest… Mirror… shave… neck.. eyeful .. Gawd – I almost asked her to shave my neck for a third time, but I guess she may have found out. Thank gawd for that cloak I tells ya.. Eh lads?!

As I type I’m watching “Phoenix Nights” for about the millionth time. This is a fantastic comedy series by Peter Kay and I’m getting seriously side-tracked… :) Every time I watch it I see something new… Some excellent quotes from the show..

(Trying to convince Brian to take a bucking bronko machine)

– “Give it a couple of days and it’ll be shitting money”

(After seeing all the customers cheering on the riders of the bucking bronko)

– “I’ve not seen them this excited since they printed that peodophiles address in the paper”

(Max and Paddy)

– “Swift scissor kick to the temple, goodnight my son”
– “Y’see, this is why I stopped going to parents evenings”

For more classic quotes, click here for Series 1 sounds and here for Series 2 sounds.