Flying back home

Planes are bloody scary things at times. Right now we’re flying back to the UK but, whilst sitting at the start of the runway the pilot came onto the tanoy to say…

“And while we’re waiting for clearance you may want to know about some of the complexities of flying. We’re about 300 tonnes in weight tonight, quite light really, and we’ll be at about 180 miles an hour at take off”

Only 180 miles an hour? Now seriously, you’re having laugh with me aren’t you?! 180mph is roughly the speed that the cab-driver was doing on the way to the airport.
That can’t really be quick enough to launch this huge 747 off the ground can it?

Ahhhh the taxi ride…. Yes it was interesting to say the least. A big, fat yellow cab which designed by a blind person and quite clearly not built for speed was somehow hurled down the tunnel towards Bostons’ Logan airport as fast as it would go. The 1980’s automatic gearbox didn’t quite know what to do at this speed, and it appeared that our driver had even less idea. He was busy arguing with someone on his mobile phone while wrestling the fur-covered steering wheel around like a 3-year-old child in an amusement arcade. We slid about in the back like marbles in a tray. When we wobbled to a halt (gotta love that suspension) I was glad to pay him just to make him go away.

Anyhow, the food is arriving now, plus the pilot has now told us that a hefty tail-wind means we’re bombing along at nearly 700mph. Ha! Beat that Mr Crazy Taxi Man!