Faster! Faster! The football is on! Panic!

Driving home this evening was just insane. There’d been a crash on the M6 at Junction 15 and somehow the driver had managed a head-on collision with ….. the crash barrier. Now that takes skill.

After pulling away from the rubber-necking throng I noticed a people-carrier wedged firmly in my rear-view mirror. I mover over then he, and another three cars, flew past at a rate of knots. Further down the motorway and the traffic got heavier – people then decided to dash down lane one and there was plenty of drivers cutting people up, under-taking and, in general, everyone was driving like an utter mental person.


Well, the football. England v Brazil this evening at the oh-it’s-finally-finished-Wembley stadium.

I’d heard a few people talking about the footie during today but had to laugh at a guy on his mobile phone this lunch-time. The reason I over-heard his call is a little vulgar, but I’ll tell you anyway. Put simply, I was in the toilet at work. There I was, sat in a cubical minding my own business when a guy walks in on his mobile phone…

..this is strangely normal, and I’ve known people chat away on their mobile – clinching deals or calling important business contacts – whilst having a pee at the urinals.

Yes, it may be a little weird but there you go. :)

Anyhow, this guy walked in and I quickly figured he was on the phone to his wife or girlfriend. Strangely he continued talking quite loudly even though he was stood right outside the cubicle and could obviously hear (and smell I’m afraid) me in there. He was so close in fact that I could just hear his other half through the ear piece.

The conversation pretty much went like this…

Him – “No love, it’s the toilets. Yeah… well, everyone can hear me in the corridor so..”

..I thought that I was about to hear some sordid and secret deals about this mans’ life, but no – it turns out that he’d walked in the toilet because he didn’t want his mates to hear him grovelling to his missus (come on, admit it, we all do it at times!) Why? Well, just like the traffic I was about to experience a few hours later, it was all due to the football…

Him – “…but how about another night love?”

Her – “Why? I’ve told them now though.”

Him – “Yeah but the football is on…”

Her – “Huh?”

Him – “The football..” this point he walked away from the cubicle so I couldn’t hear what she was saying any more..

Him – “Yeah but…”

Him – “But…”

Him – “…it’s England…”

Him – “..but… but…. I know.. but…

Him – “It’s England and Brazil…”

Him – “…yeah…. I know.. but…”

Then he came back again, pacing up and down right outside the door. I managed to hear the wife / girlfriend talking rather loudly at this point and, it’s safe to say that it didn’t sound good…

Him – “..but it’s at the new Wembley..”

Her – “I’ve had this planned though, it’s not fair..”

Him – “Come on love, I just need the TV for a bit..”

Her – “..I think you’re being a bit selfish though really (blar blar)”

Him – “But… but… Beckham is back on the team. He’s playing tonight.”

Her – “Er… Well, OK. I guess we can watch it for a bit then.

Amazing isn’t it ? All it takes for a woman to crumble is the mere mention of David Beckham! :)

Perhaps that explains the traffic? It wasn’t just football-crazy blokes driving home like nutters, it was the women too! :)