Don’t try jokes with the mother in law :)

Today it’s pretty snowy. I was out clearing the snow from the drive and my mother-in-law turned up. “You wouldn’t believe it”, she said, “the amount of people walking around wihtout hats or gloves on in this weather”. There’s a biting wind, it’s seriously cold. “I’ve just walked to the Co-Op”, she continued, “..and this girl, she was about 20,… Read more →

The biggest problem in the snow

Sure, the papers might be full of stories involving traffic chaos and closed schools, but the worse possible part of the bad weather is often missed by the national news. Instead of adding stories involving blocked roads and people falling over, we should instead concentrate on the fact that the snow has more serious, more annoying repercussions. You lose satellite… Read more →

Lana Del Rey is back again

Remember Video Games by Lana Del Ray? There was a pretty excellent remix out at the time but most people heard the radio edit, which was shit. Anyways, here’s another new one – Summertime Sadness. Again, if you do hear this on the radio then it’ll probably be the crap radio edit. So instead this is the Cedric Gervais Remix,… Read more →

Spammy phone calls

I absolutely, utter HATE people calling me up in the evenings asking for stuff or selling something. Tonight It was Marie Cure, calling from 02034762654. I’ve got a very short fuse with these people, but when they’re calling at 9PM it really bugs me. So, Mr Internet, if you’re connected to the Marie Curie charity, advise them that calling people… Read more →

Horse balls in Ikea

You know about this meat saga. Horses have found their way into burgers but, horror of horrors, it’s now in Ikea meatballs too. Gahh! Still, it’s chance for the b3ta to create a new set of instructions… Read more →

Keeping an eye on the scammers

We’re part of the local Neighbourhood Watch scheme. It’s pretty good and gives you a reason for being generally nosey. The Police send you information on anything happening by email and recently we were informed about several scams by “Eastern Europeans” in the local area. One involved people asking for the time in supermarket car-parks (after watching someone entering their… Read more →

Some more old-school tunes for you..

A few old school tunes because I’ve not added any for a while :) Firstly, Ruff Driverz, Dreaming. Classic.. :) There’s another mix here… Next up, Brainbug, Nightmare. I certainly remember dancing away to this one back in the day :) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y7GVWs-RfFM&feature=youtube_gdata_player Read more →

I fought them off with one hand

I love this story. It’s an epic report of a man who, whilst walking home, managed to fight off four attackers, one armed with a screwdriver, without dropping his chips. This guy is an utter star. We should put him on a pedestal. This is what all men should aspire to be. I’ve got my chips, and no screwdriver-wielding nutters… Read more →

There’s bad parking, then there’s this

I follow the @yplac account on Twitter. I won’t say exactly what it stands for, but it’s all about people who can’t park properly. This one goes way and beyond just not being able to park in the lines correctly though. Epic. I don’t know whether to congratulate the driver or not though. I mean, that’s a pretty tight “space”… Read more →

Everything you see on TV is fake

Hard-working fishermen. Hard-working fishermen singing. They’re coming home after a long, hard day. They’re eating Youngs Breaded Cod. It’s a brilliant British advert… Here they come, singing as they stroll back with their fish. These hard-working men caught this fish. They braved the waves and the weather, to bring us fish… Here’s the kids, waiting patiently for their Dads to… Read more →

Snow + bin collections = Problems

Bins. It’s a subject that could start World War III in this country. Our local council provide three bins. A black one for stuff that can’t be recycled, a blue one for card / glass / plastic and a brown one for food and grass. Anyhoo, they come for the blue and black bins one week, then the black the… Read more →

ITV News, what exactly WAS that ?

I was a bit bemused by ITV News last night. They chose to run a report about a foul smell that had drifted across the channel from a french gas plant. However, the actual report went a bit like this. It’s worth sticking around until the end.. Oh, and if that gets taken offline there’s a toned down version here. Read more →